Snipets from the prophet (before he realized he was a prophet)

I was jogging around the rugby pitch, warming up for the weekend game. When The Lord spoke unto me.

He said, "Shroom! Shroom, I want you to hit the hole between the fly-half and the inside center today, and I want you to hit it at speed."

I replied, "But Lord, we play the dog-assed Huns today and they surely watcheth the fly-inside hole."

And he replied, "Do not runneth to the hole half-heartedly, but attack the hole with all your might! Drive the hole! Pound the hole, until your foes are stacked three deep to stop thy penetration!"

And I said, "Yes, my Lord. I will surely attacketh thus the whole hole and not half-heartedly, but with all my might will I smite the Huns that stand betwixt me and the try line! Please, Lord, if it be thine will, give to me a blind side winger to offload to in the tackle, so that if I fall to the dog-assed Huns, that he may be able to touch down the magic bouncing egg and secure five glorious points in thy name!"

And the Lord gave unto me, a blindside winger to offload to. And the offloading was good.

Amen.